What If "Owned" Rubs Me The Wrong Way?

Fair warning, this is pretty much writing itself as it goes. It's going somewhere, but I don't know where. Guess I'll find out when it gets there.

I was reminded today of this weird conundrum I've got, and I figured that I couldn't be the only submissive person on the face of the planet with the same issue, so I'd write about it.

And yeah, it's probably weird (maybe not on the level of Freakishly Weird, but considering how many s-types seem to squee and get all warm-and-fuzzy at the mere thought of being able to apply this particular designation to themselves, it's pretty strange)...

You see, I've got a problem with the "Owned" designation for not-single submissives.

It just rubs me the wrong way.

And it annoys me that it rubs me the wrong way. I mean, I'm supposed to be submissive right? This sort of thing should be pinging my little submissive radar and making my skivvies moist. I should be going into paroxysms of joy at the mere thought of referring to myself as Cookie's Owned Submissive... But I don't.

I get all bristly and bothered and grumpy about it. Really, I can feel frown lines forming just thinking about it. I'm having to rub the spot between my eyebrows to keep the lines from sticking (I'm getting old. This frowning business is serious stuff for my face).

So... Why?

It's just a word, right? It's just a way to let folks know that you're not-single... But married kinda does that. And monogamous implies it as well. And blah blah blah, I just cannot stand that word.

Maybe it's because I'm a pretty literal person. Owned implies stuff I'd rather not think about- Real slavery, the days when women were chattel, a non-consensual imbalance of equality in a relationship... Nothing that makes me feel all squishy inside, like a warm Danish. Stuff that makes me feel icky.

Plus, the fact that it's not actually possible to own another human being in this country kinda makes the label seem rather pointless. Like, "Yeah, suuuuuure... You own that person. Uh-huh."

Maybe it's because, despite our unequal amounts of authority in the relationship, as a person I am his equal. My worth is just as great as his. And if I'm his... Well, he's mine as well. We belong to each other, we have an equal claim on each other, and both of us are equally capable of walking away if the relationship stops fulfilling our wants and/or needs. In my head, "owned" makes it all seem rather one sided, as if he would be the only person in the relationship with worth, like I wouldn't have any claim on him... I would be his but he wouldn't be mine.

And that's it. That last line there is what bothers me the most. Because he is mine, an idea that seems to be super frowned-upon in the D/s world. I couldn't belong to somebody who didn't belong to me. I couldn't invest in someone who wasn't equally invested in me... So to hell with you, "Owned." I am my beloved's and my beloved is mine, and that doesn't make me any less submissive than the chick who squees all over every forum in the Kinkyverse about how proud she is to be owned. It doesn't make Cookie any less Domly than a guy who's got "Owner of" plastered on his profile.

Or maybe it does and we're both going to get kicked out of the club.

Oh well. We'll just start our own club then, I guess. Difficult Untrue Submissives Who Belong To The Domlies Who Are Proud To Belong To Them... Or something.

Shit. Sounds like cat people, doesn't it?