I don't think I've done a "proper" introduction... And no, this isn't one, I'm just bored.

So here goes, for anybody who is interested to know me.

I'm Squeaky. Like Bella it's not my real name, but it is one that I answer to at home (more than my real name actually, which is long and pretentious and I don't much care for at all).

This is me. I'm a goofy-looking son of a gun. But being 36 (Eeek!) will do that to you I suppose... Though to be honest I was goofy looking well before this most recent birthday (Which was in December. I'm a Xmas baby). I also might have some self-esteem issues, other kids can do that to you. But I'm working on that. So far it's going pretty well. 5 out of 7 days I can say that I think I'm kinda cool... But I can't say I look nice. Meh. Such is life.

I was married to a Vanilla guy for close to 10 years and I figured out that I liked being the submissive partner a few years in. That's when I started reading and learning, but the internet back then wasn't what it is now and I was a bit limited in what I could discover. Also a bit limited in real life experience because Vanilla Husband was very, painfully, vanilla.

I have three kids. My eldest is 12 and my twins are 7. They're all boys. I wanted a girl, desperately, but in retrospect I'm glad I didn't have one. I also have three dogs. Hol who has been in a previous post, Skipper who is my Old Guy (he's 13), and Vincent Price. They're all mutts and all came from my local animal shelter. Hol is a saint, Skip is The Best Dog Ever, and Vinnie is a shithead. But he's cute so he gets away with it.

 

This guy is my Cookie. I figured I'd include him here because I talk about him so much (because he's awesome!). I met him a few years after the Ex and I separated on OKC. We had both done those goofy quizzes that say how kinky and experimental and all that sort of thing, so I had some hopes that he might be, well, THAT sort of fun. He was.

He also turned out to be one of the best people I've ever had the honor of knowing, and he's managed to out-best-friend my bestest girlfriend who I've known for over 20 years. We're all sorts of compatible and it rocks. I feel lucky to have found him.

We've been together for 5 years and got married in June 2012, (actually, we eloped which pissed off our families but good).

 

What else?

I like to read. A lot. I probably have over a thousand books in my home and since discovering that I can buy 5 of them for a dollar at the thrift stores? My addiction may have gotten slightly out of hand.

I write, sometimes well, sometimes poorly. Mostly just to amuse myself.

I'm a really great chef and I very much enjoy baking. Cupcakes are my latest passion. Man, I love cupcakes.

 

 

I sew, mostly for myself and Cookie but occasionally I do custom work for others.

My IQ is somewhere in the 140s, which makes me smart but not super special Doogie Howser smart.

I'm an avid scavenger and can spend hours pawing through the racks at thrift stores to find nifty things (If you're in the area, the Salvation Army on 75and Sashabaw has the best stock of any thrift store I've ever gone to).

I can lick my elbow. It's my one good Stupid Person Trick.

I'm a rabid non-conformist (which is conforming in another way if you care to get all philosophical about it).

I also take pictures of anything and everything. Sometimes it annoys friends and relatives, but I got a pass from one friend when her photographer at her wedding sucked and I had some luck getting good shots. Cookie especially gets tired of my Paparazzi ways, and I'd love to show you all the look he tends to give me when he thinks I've taken one photo too many- But it's not flattering and he'd complain and then I wouldn't get the hot sexings.

So instead:

A sunset, as seen from my deck. I know it's not as amusing as a bad Cookie picture, but eh. What can I do? I like the sexings.

Now, I'm trying to make myself sound interesting for anybody who might be bothering to read this, but I fear I'm not. Occasionally I do some neat stuff but mostly I'm a lazy lump of Squeaky who spends entirely too much time on the couch watching Netflix.
My house is almost always a mess (but the bed is always made).
I'm entirely too scatter-brained.
I cannot for the life of me balance a checkbook (Which is why Cookie is the Financial Guy around here, he can).
I'm liberal in my political views- Which can be good or bad, depending on your preferences.

I am a horrible-rotten submissive and not anywhere near subly enough to be called "true."
I get annoyed by rampant stupidity too easily.
I have next to no patience and what little I have gets used up by the kids, dogs, and Cookie.

My favorite place in the whole wide world is the Upper Peninsula of Michigan, up around Marquette. It's so pretty there, even if it is a two mile hike through bear infested woods to reach the prettiness sometimes... (and yes, we did see a bear on the hike to these falls).

And that's me. I like kink, I know a great deal about BDSM (And I'll admit that there's still tons for me to learn), and I have too much time on my hands so I write.

And if you've made it this far- Thanks for reading what I have to say.